What I love most about Michelle Malkin is her ideological purity. To Michelle, having a record slightly to the right of the average New York State Republican Assembly Member is equivalent to radical liberalism. You, know, it would almost be fun - in a plodding, tedious sort of way - to be making this stuff up. But, the second thing that I love about Michelle is that she saves me the trouble.
In case you missed it, the 23rd congressional district of the great state of New York had an open seat to fill. It seems that radical leftist/socialist/democrat-partyist/nazi-commie/arab-and-or-muslim President B. Hussein O'Bama, in a fit of devious cynicism, appointed Republican Congressman John M. McHugh as Secretary of the Army. Thus opened the seat, and this week's election filled it.
This district has been staunchly Republican for about as long as there have been Republicans. (You wouldn't know from looking at it today, but this was once "The Party of Lincoln." Really.) The local Republican pols selected - as is their right, I would imagine - the candidate who, in their opinion, best represented the district's Republican sensitivities. Their selection, from nine contenders, was six-term Assembly member Dierdre "Dede" Scozzafava.
But the lovely Michelle will have none of it.
Yes, it’s time for the upside-down elephant. The Stupid Party is at it again. The subject of today’s column: An abomination in the NY23 special congressional race to replace former GOP Rep. John McHugh, who accepted President Obama’s Army Secretary position. Way to go, Beltway GOP establishment. Grass-roots fiscal conservatives are fired up over ACORN, the SEIU, tax-and-spend radicals. Grass-roots social conservatives are battling radical abortion and gay marriage policies. You have been asking movement conservatives to give you money to fight the ACORN-friendly, union-pandering, tax-and-spend, radical Democrats.
Then you use their money to try and elect Dede Scozzafava, an ACORN-friendly, union-pandering, tax-and-spend radical Republican. And you use that money to fight Doug Hoffman, a viable, bona fide conservative candidate in the race who is closing the gap in the polls.
I mean, who are these upstart upstate New York yokels to propose the candidacy of a local, long term party loyalist, and main-stream Repugnicant, when there are are tea-baggers, birthers, 10thers, and 9/12ers in Alabama and Alaska who must be appeased?
So who do you suppose Michelle prefers?
Fight the GOP Beltway establishment. Contribute to Doug Hoffman today.
Because the candidate locally selected in a district that has been reliably Republican for 160 years is not Republican enough. Evidently, neither are the Republican party, Michael Steele, and John Boehner. Nor is conservative stalwart Newt "Contract on America" Gingrich.
As I mentioned in my column post on the NY23 special election, the NRCC is using conservatives’ money to back a radical leftist and attack a bona fide, viable conservative candidate for Congress in a safe Republican district. Gingrich has endorsed the radical leftist.
If the idea of Gingrich supporting a radical leftist doesn't send a frisson of cognitive dissonance right into your cerebral cortex, then you need another martini. Michelle takes it very seriously, though, as she pre-emptively dismisses Newt's potential presidential candidacy in 2012.
Picture the cabinet:
Al Sharpton as education secretary.
Scozzafava as labor secretary.
Al Gore as global warming czar.
But I digress. It seems Michelle is not alone in her outrage at this "abomination." Under the expert influence of such great conservative minds as -
The wrecking crew of Kristol, Fred Thompson, Dick Armey, Michele Bachmann, The Wall Street Journal editorial page and the government-bashing Club for Growth all joined the Hoffman putsch. Then came the big enchilada: a Hoffman endorsement from Palin on her Facebook page. Such is Palin’s clout that Steve Forbes, Rick Santorum and Tim Pawlenty, the Minnesota governor (and presidential aspirant), promptly fell over one another in their Pavlovian rush to second her motion. They were joined by far-flung Republican congressmen from Kansas, Georgia, Oklahoma and California, not to mention a gaggle of state legislators from Colorado. On Fox News, Beck took up the charge, insinuating that Hoffman’s Republican opponent might be a fan of Karl Marx. Some $3 million has now been dumped into this race by outside groups.
Well, the 3 million bucks were effective, in a way. Radical left-wing pinko proto-commie Scozzafava dropped out of the race - on Hollowe'en, if I recall correctly - leaving Republicans, Royalists, Whigs, and conservatives of all stripes the singular choice of Mr. Doug Hoffman.
Not that there weren't a few problems with the Hoffman candidacy, like, frex, he doesn't live in the district, and has no grasp of local issues.
And maybe this doesn't matter, either:
Last week it turned out that Hoffman’s prime attribute to the radical right — as a take-no-prisoners fiscal conservative — was bogus. In fact he’s on the finance committee of a hospital that happily helped itself to a $479,000 federal earmark. Then again, without the federal government largess that the tea party crowd so deplores, New York’s 23rd would be a Siberia of joblessness. The biggest local employer is the pork-dependent military base, Fort Drum.
But, at the end of the day, none of it mattered, and maybe the $ three million weren't so effective after all, since, the Democratic candidate - whoever he was - won the election.
I'm struggling with schadenfreude here. 2012 is a ways off, and I don't want to develope false optimism. But Michelle gives me hope. Keep driving that base to the right, sweetheart, farther and farther from the main stream, and anything that resembles sanity. It's why we love you. Really!
The love - it BURNS!
A big hat tip to NYT columnist Frank Rich who did all the heavy lifting for his column which I have both liberally (so to speak) quoted above, and drawn on in a miriad of other subtle ways. And a big-boatload of love to Michelle, whithout whom, none of this would have been possible. Or necessary.